Shifty goings-on...Oriental Touch car park

Washed out, wan, tired-looking individuals who could do with a sartorial make-over... Stained grey joggers, I mean honestly...don't they realise how passé that is.... and, equally oddly, possessing one person's worth of teeth between 3 to 4 people...anyone would think NHS dentistry was a thing of the past...Anyway, with little zest for life but a certain indescribable fervour, these individuals persist in hanging out on street corners looking out for other individuals who look equally shifty but slightly more wealthy (in relative terms, and if you're content to accept matching Adidas/Nike tracksuit top and bottoms, with fewer stains, bum bags worn over the shoulder - again WTF? - and saddled upon a trusty steed like a BMX, or if you're lucky and well and truly part of their bourgeois circles, driving a careworn black BMW X3) before conducting odd handshakes and immediately moving apart at speed... again,speed is relative, it's the kind of speed inevitably achieved by those shuffling zombies in The Walking Dead (but by these odd locals' standards, I'm sure it's positively Olympic Record stuff!). Anyway,enough rambling. Are these part of a new underground Mason's movement I'm unaware of? Should I be jealous? How do I join? Should we be informing Dan Brown so he can come and study this new sect and what should we call it? The mystery is killing me...and seems to be killing them too if I'm honest but anyway...over to you dear readers...